A Renaissance Affaire

MEGATRON:
Although it was HYSTERICAL that SkyLynx now has Starscream convinced that the Jersey Devil is real, we still have to keep our processors on task. Namely; World Domination. I've heard the flesh-creature talk of a place in Pennsylvania where Time and Space have ruptured and inside the rupture is medieval England. How fortuitous! We can travel back in time and conquer most of the known world in it's infancy! We passed by Philadelphia on our way to to the time rupture. Hmm, I wonder if Starscream would bounce if I shoved him out the window...

STARSCREAM:
We paused on our journey to pay homage to one who has already conquered much of the free world; Starbucks. I feel an affinity for this company and Megatron is simply addicted to their Pumpkin Spice Lattes... Hmm, perhaps I can use that later...

MEGATRON:
We have safely entered the time rupture and are now in a small corner of old England. First stop was for munitions. You can't properly conquer and inspire terror without something that goes BOOM. I found this old cason to be rather amusing, especially when it terrified some Tartans right out of their kilts!

STARSCREAM:
I'm beginning to NOT like this period of time. We toured a local dungeon, and even though this picture came out rather dark, be glad of it. You do NOT want to see the atrocities humans inflicted upon each other. Mayhaps it's that red stuff that comes out of them but it all just seems so... FRIGHTENING. I hope Megatron doesn't adopt these brutal practices...

MEGATRON:
I never thought I'd see the day when humans actually provide something useful, other than energon. These devices are PERFECT for the Decepticon regime. It's EXACTLY what I need to keep these buffoons in line! I do hope they take Visa.
((Sorry about the pics, I was in a hurry.))

STARSCREAM:
I just got a cold shiver down my spinal column relays... No matter, already Megatron was busy choosing locations for our energon generators. He certainly does not waste time, now does he.

MEGATRON:
What a comely young flesh-creature! Sorry m'lay but I'm afraid I'm not attracted to your kind. However, one I take over, I'll glad have you as one of my personal buff and polishers.

MEGATRON:
This strange flesh creature claimed to be the beggar king of England. Dethroning this human was a piece of oil cake! Well medieval England, consider yourself conquered. For now Starscream and I are off to Las Vegas to take Sin City!

Running With The (Jersey) Devil

(( Read this comic to get part of the story: http://nagi-oki.deviantart.com/art/SB-Tall-Tales-100979879 ))

Megatron:
Tonight the Autobots were sitting down around a campfire telling human apparition stories. The blue fop, Tracks, told a particularly interesting one about a denizen of the state known as the Jersey Devil. It's complete and utter nonsense, however...I DO see possibilities... ENTERTAINING possibilities... Mwa ha ha ha ha!

Starscream:
Thanks to that blue idiot, Megatron now is CONVINCED there is a monster lurking in the woods! Now he has ME out here scouring the vicinity looking for any signs that this creature exists.

Starscream:
Ok, I've been searching for a mega cycle now, still no sign of this supposed Jersey Devil. Megatron must have spilled some coffee in his circuits to think that such a legend is real! Still, the Autobots swear by it and refuse to leave the house after dark...

Starscream:
THREE MEGACYCLES now and STILL no sign of this monster! But the wood are so dark and vast. It would be impossible for me to search them all. Maybe there is-- GAH! No! I'm NOT thinking about it, I'M NOT THINKING ABOUT IT!

Starscream:
Alright, the sun is setting, it's getting dark, I'm cold, I'm in need of fuel, and the squirrels are giving me dirty looks. I'm giving up the search as fruitless. I'm not going to stay out here all night looking for a monster that obviously does NOT exist!

Megatron:
It was sometime past midnight when we were awoken from recharge by some strange sounds coming from INSIDE the house. It is probably just one of the felines lurking about, but just for fun, I sent out Starscream to investigate the disturbance. He's so snappy when he doesn't get his beauty recharge...

Starscream:
STUPID MEGATRON! Waking me up in the middle of the night to investigate some mystery noise! Oh Primus forbid our fearless leader goes out to see what the threat is himself! Still... the house is strangely quiet at night... so still... even the cats are asleep... But I'm not afraid in the dark, I'm very brave in the dark, I'm AMAZING in the dark I--

Starscream:
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Decepticons Have Landed

Megatron:
We have FINALLY landed in the United States of America, in one of the smaller states known as New Jersey. Good thing too, because if Starscream asked me "Are we there yet?" one more time, I would have booted him into the Atlantic. The flesh-creature we are staying with is a rather strange one... The less said about that, the better.

Starscream:
We finally arrived, and much to our delight, there was already an established colony of Decepticons here! At first we thought they had anticipated our arrival and had secured us a base to start our hostile take over. Unfortunately, this was NOT the case. They merely are ALLOWED to live here, like tenants in an apartment. Although it WAS rather humorous to watch Megatron flip out on the leader of this colony, Shrapnel.

Megatron:
OF ALL THE IDIOTIC NONSENSE!
Not only are these Decepticons LAZY, UNMOTIVATED, OBNOXIOUS, AND IRRESPONSIBLE! Shrapnel is ineffective as a leader! None the less, I decided to take control of the colony. The apathetic morons had no interest in taking on the neighboring Autobot colony. So I decided to take them on myself...
I... had not reckoned with the uh... well...

Starscream:
I have not been able to stop laughing since Megatron decided to take on the Autobots. Skywarp told me the Decepticons are out numbered 4 to 1 here. THAT'S why they don't fight the Autobots. Common sense. Something Megatron LACKS severely. So while our GLORIOUS LEADER was enjoying a rather delightful beating. I decided to make my alliances. There was a rather handsome devil in charge of the "Brigade", a HANDSOME group of seekers that have broken off from the main group of Decepticons. I'm particularly drawn to the leader, he is so dashing, intelligent, and mighty... I think I'm falling in love!

Megatron:
After I managed to convince Ultra Magnus and Prowl I was joking about obliterating them off the face of the planet (For the moment at least). I decided to start off a little smaller. There's also an ostracized colony of Transformers here. I decided to throw my weight onto them. But... taking one look at those... those malformed machines... I-I just couldn't find it in my spark to do it. I may be a cold war machine but... those horrid faces must be hard enough on them... So I gave them a verbal threat and shot at the one I ASSUMED was Bumblebee.

Megatron:
I have not seen Starscream for a while, no doubt he is finding allies in any other Starscreams around here. I'm not worried about that, I'm more concerned about the three furry creatures roaming around this base. So far I have managed to tame one of the beasts, making it my noble steed. I'll have more to report as we take the state of New Jersey!